Hakham Yoseph Hayyim relates the following story that actually occurred. Two young newlywed brides arrived at a party. One of them, who was from a very wealthy family, wore a simple dress made of wool, which she bought for a modest price. On her finger she wore a gold-plated ring with an imitation stone. All those present at the party stared at her and whispered to each other, "What an amazing dress. It must have been specially made in an expensive designer store, and cost thousands. And the ring is beyond estimation." Each woman tried to estimate the value of the ring but all agreed that it was beyond evaluation.
The second recent bride was from a family of extremely modest means. She borrowed an expensive silk gown from a very generous friend who also lent her a costly gold ring set with an exquisite diamond. The guests looked at her and commented, "What an ugly piece of clothing. It's plain to all that it is not real silk. The ring doesn't even bear mentioning. It is obviously plated copper with a piece of polished glass on top".
Clearly, wealth does bring honor, and we should respect those who have been blessed with money because Haqqadosh Barukh Hu (the Holy One Blessed Be He) is the one who decided to honor them with it.
We all fall into the trap, on occasion, however, of judging others based on their socio-economic status or their external appearance. Similarly we often judge the religiosity of people by their external appearance. While doing so, in many cases, gives us a good indication of where the person is holding, sometimes it fails us. Appreciating the inside of a person is a slow process that requires patience and time, but it gives us a more accurate understanding of who the person is. We live in a society where results have to be immediate and we get answers at the click of a button.
We owe it to others to allow them the time to be able to penetrate their inner selves, whether when interviewing them for a job, or as part of the shidduch (dating) process or for any reason. We must always remember that, as Jews, we were all created with a holy Neshama (soul) which was breathed into us directly from the Holy One Blessed Be He.
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